September Onto Oregon

Namaste’ Everyone :)

It has been a really full past month or so. Given that the events and sequence of events are slightly jumbled in the ol’ noggin. This is going to be a really really long post because I am writing about all of September up until where I am at now which is the homestead in OR. I have been here for a few days but I cut the post off at the day I arrived so that this one doesn’t get any longer than it already is. I will just start rambling and insert things as I remember them. There is also a Montana, Washington and Oregon folder now in the photos section and I have added more photos to the Miscellaneous section.

I will start with why I came back to SC early. I am leaving for Oregon around October 11th. With that max it will cost around $900 (that is giving me some wiggle room) in gas money just to get out there. The ride back will be shorter so it won’t cost as much. I leave the west coast around mid-February. Then the total cost of monthly bills being around $2000 (again leaving wiggle room) as well as needing to make some car repairs I was realizing that the 2 weeks I originally planned for being back in SC was not enough time to make the money I needed to make especially given I only had $1000 to my name. Given all of this I decided to cut my stay short in Tennessee and come back here.

Luckily when I got back I immediately started picking up work. The night I got back I went to see the peoples at Willy Taco and 2 of my coworkers actually offered me up their shifts for the next day which was great. I started picking up lots more shifts from there. From the time I got back to when I left for NC I was working at Willy Taco and doing my best to catch up with family and friends.

The next weekend I was back I went up to Lewisville NC for the Honey Bee Hemp Fest. They had lots of farming workshops which is the main reason I wanted to go. I met Hannah out there because we were going to go together. She was coming down from Maine back to SC. We were originally going to meet in TN and caravan from there. We met the day before the festival and found a nice Walmart parking lot to stay in. It was in between Winston-Salem and Lewisville. We stayed up for a bit catching up and swapping stories. It was really nice to see her again. The next morning we went to the festival. It was only a day long. They had permaculture, bee keeping and pollinators, composting and worm composting, mushroom cultivation and a few other workshops. I attended most of them. It was a small area but setup really well. They had lots of fun vendors and food stalls. They could’ve been better about announcing when the workshops were going on. The weather was incredible and there were also some really good bands. There was one at the beginning that I didn’t get great vibes from. We ended up leaving around 3-4 because we were both getting tired and I was also starting to feel bogged down like I had picked up some dense stuff. Before we got to the festival we stopped by this coffee shop that was really cutesy and had a rustic vibe to it. The coffee was good. Slightly above average. After we left the festival we went for coffee again. We were going to go to this one on the way to Boone like 15 minutes up the road but slightly out of the way. However on the way out and to that coffee shop we spotted a pop up one in the parking lot of this brewery place. It is called Stone Colds. It is an espresso bar owned and operated by one guy. I think his name either had Steve or Austin or it was actually Steve Austin (I don’t remember). However he said he got the name Stone Colds from “Stone Cold Steve Austin” because his name was similar and a friend had pointed it out to him. Which I know I have heard the name before but I have no idea who he is. (Just looked it up. He was a WWE wrestler) Anyway it’s a really cool name. The guy is incredibly personable and friendly. He was great to chat with. He also told us and showed us pictures of how he started and it is incredible to see the progress he has made. From starting in his college dorm to having his own pop up place to continuing to better his craft and establishment. The coffee was also excellent. I got the chocolate cold brew and is definitely one of the best coffees I have ever had. We were craving pizza so we set off for a pizza place in Boone.

The place we went to was called The Lost Province. It was about a 20 minute wait and well worth it too. They had live music in there and they were really good. They played a lot of good covers. When I got there I was still feeling like I had bogged down so I went to the bathroom to clear out and recenter myself. We got sat upstairs next to the railing so we could see the music and the whole restaurant. They also had a micro-brewery in there. We got the roasted olives as an appetizer, the sweet beet for our pizza and the chocolate brownie sundae as our dessert. The olives were incredible. I hadn’t ever had roasted olives before and it is now my favorite form of olive. The sweet beet had Rosemary Olive Oil, Fresh Mozzarella, Gorgonzola, Sweet Potatoes, Beets, Candied Walnuts, Rosemary, Jalapeño Honey. It is the best pizza I have ever had. I could eat 2 of them and I am strongly contemplating stopping by and getting one when I leave for OR. Because of Hurricane Helene coming through going back through Boone for some of that pizza wasn’t an option anymore however if I ever pass through there again I’ll definitely stop by. The sundae was incredible! It was very rich and delicious. The first bite lit me up like a Christmas tree. We didn’t finish it tho because we were both stuffed. With all of that plus the 2 drinks she got was only $50. After that we went and walked off some of the food we just ate and then went to a nearby Walmart to sleep at for the night. When we were going to bed this guy walked down and back on the side walk a few times. I watched him for a bit to see if he was someone we needed to be concerned about but I felt after a bit that he wasn’t and he eventually quit walking back and forth and left.

The next day we went to a hiking trail that had a really nice small waterfall. Doing my practices there was really rejuvenating and bolstering. I also ate the rest of this salad I had gotten the other day. After I did the practices I went exploring further up stream. There were some incredibly beautiful and mystical spots up there. I could have stayed there all day wandering up and down the stream, resting on moss covered rocks. On our way out we passed this older couple that had some really cool staffs. *It has been a month since all of this and a lot has happened and some details are missing now* At some point in the day we went to this coffee shop because I had Pod (Pod = Class every Sunday with Jnanda and the other newbees). The coffee shop was incredible. They had a whole section of records and record players, a spot with couches and chairs that had 2 switches. They also had extra chargers. They had a space for open mics and other places to chill. It was a great place that had good specialty coffee but horrible basic coffee. After that I forgot what entirely happened next however Hannah found this place in Pisgah National Forest to camp at for the night that was on the way to Asheville. It was great! We took a gravel road to get to the spot and we had no service at all. Hannah pulled out the camping stove and cooked this amazing meal. It was Sharshuka and she nailed it. A fire would’ve been really amazing but everything was wet. As I was falling asleep I had some things arising for me that I embraced.

The next day we went to Asheville. When we got there we went to Taco Temple for lunch. It is literally the best tacos I have ever had. (Here is the menu if you are curious https://www.mamacitastacotemple.com/menu) They make there tortillas in house and They are great. I get the corn tortillas and they are soft and fluffy. They also have incredible food combinations. Hannah had never been there before and she loved it! After we ate we went to Dobra Tea to chill and have some good tea. She had never been there before. We went and sat in the barefoot section. It has really low lighting there and is a great ambiance for tea time. We got a Pu-erh tea because I love it, they had a good selection and Hannah had never had it before. It was great! We had lots of good deep conversation that was very beneficial for us both. While we were there my mom called me and said my neighbor needed some help finishing up some jobs he had because he is about to move. I got into contact with him and he told me that he would pay me $20/hr. He asked if I could work the next day and I said you bet! We were supposed to head back to SC the next day but since I got that work opportunity we left after we got done having tea.

My neighbor owns a construction company and he is working on getting all of his current jobs finished up since he is about to move to Michigan. Working with him we demolished a chimney in an old house. We also put some dry wall up which I had never done before. It was a lot of fun and he is a really great guy to work for. I messed up multiple times and he was very understanding and compassionate and never berated me for it. That was really great for me because I have fear momentums concerning the construction field where I get really anxious about messing anything up or not making something perfect. There are others where I feel very stiff, rigid and on edge. It is something I am working through and being in these environments where it is okay to mess up aids me greatly with that. I have found that the majority of this stems from working construction for my uncle years ago where it was constantly a stressful environment. Being a 15 y/o never having done anything like that before and still getting berated and cussed out for messing things up, not doing it the right way, working crazy hours, being surrounded by a lot of toxicity and many other things.

For the remainder of the time in SC I was running at 100mph. I was working as much as I could. Working doubles at Willy Taco, working for Jordan as needed, then going into a shift at Willy or finding any other work I could find. If I wasn’t working I was making time as best I could to catch up with friends and family. I always made time for my practices each day to continue the momentum building. While I was back in those old environments I noticed lots of old egoic momentums trying to resurface and I refused to allow that to happen. Some of those were sometimes when it was time for practices this thought would arise of “Oh I am kinda tired and it’s a little late I can do this later”. I recognized that one immediately. If I had listened to that and given in then it would’ve continued to happen to the point where I would’ve completely stopped doing the practices. I also noticed the urge to sit and binge watch TV for hours which I redirected with watching videos about farming and its many aspects (and taking notes on them) so that if I was watching something I was learning something and using the time wisely. If it wasn’t that I would do an activity that would aid my growth instead of perpetuating old momentums. Although sometimes I did sit and watch a few hours of One Piece which I worked on and over time whittled down to an episode or two if I did go the route of watching TV. When Hurricane Helene came through I was at my mom and step dad’s house watching their dogs for them while they were in Maine. I have seen some wild storms there but nothing like this. A big tree in the back yard snapped in half (didn’t land on the house but in the yard). Another tree uprooted slightly and leaned against the house, I had to prune some branches back so that it would quit scraping the window. Some shingles flew off so I went into the attic to put a tarp down over everything so that it wouldn’t get messed up. I watched 4 trees fall in the woods behind the house. A tree fell across the entrance to the neighborhood and knocked out some power lines. The backside of the neighborhood was completely blocked off from down trees and there was a transformer on the ground shattered. My grandfathers house had a huge tree in his backyard. Friday after the storm started to calm down I went out to look at the damages of the town. I first went towards Cowpens and on the way there I saw about 15 (give or take a few) trees down in the road, mostly all on one side. Once I got into Cowpens I went to go down some roads I haven’t been on in a while and pretty much all of them were blocked off. There was really only 1-2 ways in and out of Cowpens at that time. After I left Cowpens I went towards downtown. Traffic was worse than during rush hour. From then till the next 3-4 days after it was like that and very slowly started to dwindle. There was only about a mile stretch of E. Main St. in the Hillcrest area that had power, and only 2 gas stations open in Spartanburg for the first 3ish days. The drive from the neighborhood to Wells Fargo is typically about 6 minutes but during those days it was taking about 30+ minutes. After riding through downtown for a bit checking things out I went by the Cottonwood Trail and Lawsons Fork Creek (which runs alongside the trail) because the water level is always really high after large storms and it’s really fascinating to see. However this time it was much more flooded than I have ever seen. There is a community pool right next to one part of the trail and there are some buildings there and they were halfway under water. The bridge right next to that that crosses the river had about 6ft of clearance from the underside of the bridge to the top of the water and I had never seen the gap that close before. There is another road nearby to that area that has an entrance to the trail that I frequent and the water was so high that road was inaccessible. That also wasn’t the only road flooded to that level. Spartanburg had it pretty tough, definitely better than most however worse than others and in my life the most damaging I had experienced. I had passed a house on my way to Glendale Shoals that day as well that a tree had fallen straight through and completely destroyed the house. Unfortunately I have no news on if they are okay or not. It also took my moms house I think close to 2 weeks to get power back and it took Spartanburg a little over a week to get full power back.

The Monday after the storm I picked my Mom and Step Dad up from the airport. I had been wanting to have a sit down with them and set some boundaries and discuss some things about the house and the dynamic of the house. After being gone for almost 3 months, growing in the ways that I have, raising my manner of living and coming back to that environment with fresh eyes I noticed a lot of very toxic/unhealthy momentums and a standard of living that could be much better. I would love to tell everything about what I noticed, how I felt about it and how I want to go about bringing it up and lay out solutions of how these things can be worked on, to talk about the boundaries I am setting, why and what caused these things to be brought to my attention. I want to tell it all because with this blog I don’t want it to just be the sunshines and rainbows I want you all to see the mud and murky water. I want you to see that when it is swamp water it can still be waded through and it can still be purified. This instance would be great for that however I feel that they would not enjoy having all of what I’d have to say be out in the open for public eyes and so therefore I will keep the details very vague. Anyway back to the topic. I was planning on having the sit down with them when we got back from the airport, however I had a migraine from the time I woke up to when I got them. I was honestly barely able to drive and luckily Dwayne took over driving for me. I feel that the migraine was because of caffeine withdraw because during this time I was drinking lots and lots of coffee to compensate for the drastic alteration in routine with very little rest. The day before Monday I hadn’t had any coffee and then woke up with said migraine. I took 2 prescription ibuprofens (spaced out) another headache medicine, attempted the ice pack trick and nothing was working. On the way back to the house we stopped by Little River and as soon as I drank some of the coffee the migraine started to go away. I was still feeling icky when we got to the house so I decided to wait till I was feeling better and able to have that kind of conversation. However by the time I was feeling better the option to have that conversation was off the table. Given that I decided I might be able to do it in the morning before I leave for Greer and then went to do some research and practices. During my practices it was hard to focus because of non-friendly communication coming from downstairs so I moved to my room to hopefully cut out the sound. That however didn’t work. I was becoming really affected by it and was really attempting to power through because I was going to be leaving in the morning. However at some point I heard something and the words that came out of my mouth were “Fuck this I am leaving” and I shot up and immediately started to grab my things. It took a few trips to get everything in the car. I accidentally left my brake pads and rotors there which I went back for later, as well as my Social Security card and Passport which I will explain in a bit. I told my Mom I was leaving and gave a vague answer as to why. When I was pulling out of the road I started to cry. I was crying for leaving in that way, leaving without really any explanation and also for relief. The relief came more from my inner child for not staying in that environment and for doing what was best and removing myself from it. It would have been smart to pull over and really let it pour out however I really needed gas and I felt that if I didn’t go straight to a gas station I would’ve run out of gas. While I was driving and crying I had to stop the crying for a sec and breathe so I didn’t pass out while driving. Once I got to the gas station I called a friend and asked if I could stay at her house for the night because I knew she would answer, I knew she had space, she was close and considering road conditions and power outages the easiest place to get to. I am incredibly grateful for her kindness and willingness to give me the space I needed and to hear my situation and to be there for me. After I got off the phone with her I called Saucha and talked with him and received some guidance from him as well. I am honestly really grateful for this experience because it taught me a lot, it gave me an opportunity to stand up for myself, hold myself to my new level and to show me that I will always choose growth and what is best for that. It allowed me to feel and release a lot of emotions some that had been tucked away for a while. After I finished the call with Saucha an old friend had pulled in. I hadn’t seen him in about a year 1/2. I had considered not saying anything to him however I had been thinking about him recently and was curious as to how he was doing these days. The answer is really about the same. With that I radiated Love to him and went on my way.

I got to my friends house. Her and her boyfriend were out getting food and another friend and his partner were there and they let me in. As soon as I walked into the building he asked me how I was doing and I started crying and told him about it. He was very comforting and gave me a really nice hug and when we got into the apartment he offered to make me some cheese quesadillas which I happily accepted and they were some of the best quesadillas I’ve ever had. We hung out for a bit and then Tera and her boyfriend got back and I told them the story to and then we all just chilled for the night. I got up early morning and I went back for the car parts, Social Security car and passport and then I left for Greer. I needed those things because in 2ish weeks I would be leaving for the West Coast and I have no idea when I will be back to SC and I may need those things for if I decide to stop by Canada for a bit or get a job somewhere.

On my way there I stopped by my Dads house to catch up with him. It was really nice we sat on the front porch and chatted for a bit. It was a very beautiful and peaceful day. Our relationship hit a rough patch during my high school years and now putting forth effort into building that relationship back up has been nice. I really enjoy the time we get to spend together. After I left there I ran into my Papa (my Dads dad). We haven’t had really any relationship the past 2+ years. Being the rebellious kid I was and being different from a lot of people in my family and especially with how I live this life I felt that with his conditionings he wouldn’t be able to accept me as I am and most of the interactions we would have there would be a “you need to do this, you need to do that” lecture more so than conversation. I also felt there was just general misunderstanding/inability to understand what it is I am doing and why. It is honestly a whole can of worms with lots of nuances. So when I saw him my first thought was “oh this isn’t going to be fun and it’s going to be just like the rest of the conversations we’ve had” and as soon as it came up I was like well hold on it has been quite a long time since I’ve seen him this time could be different, so I went into it without expectations. It was the best interaction I have ever had with him in my entire life. I am not sure if he knew I had tattoos or not and I know he didn’t know I had my nose pierced. He didn’t say a word about them and didn’t seem to be judgmental about it. We had a great conversation about what I had been doing and what I am about to do and he was very happy and encouraging about it. I used to not respond to his text or phone calls but since that interaction I will definitely respond to him whenever he messages or calls me. After that I went up the road to some old family friends produce stand. I hadn’t seen them in years and since I wasn’t going to be in the area soon and for a long while I figured it would be a good time to go catch up for a bit. It was really nice. I stayed there for a few hours until it was time to go to my Aunt and Uncles house. We sat down and chatted about the past few months and all that and then we got to talking about where I’ll be in OR and what I’ll be doing which is mostly building projects and he asked if I’d like to help him with building a raised garden bed for $20 before I left to go to the Skunk Farm. I said I would love to. So we went out to where the beds were and he said what he wanted and all that and we got the wood and tools to make it happen. As we worked we continued talking and all that. It was an incredibly beautiful and peaceful day. Cutting the wood and doing all that was super easy and fun and it was great getting to catch up with them. They paid me $40 for helping which was really sweet and greatly appreciated.

I left there and went to the farm. It was the day before the festival started. Well started for the early access people. I had my Jnanda call as soon as I got there. It was really nice. I updated him on everything and he gave some really good data of the situation at the house. For the conversation I was wanting to have he said to send them an email and that is exactly what I am doing. As of this moment it is still in the works but I will have it finished and sent out before this post is made. Update on the email. It was sent and was received very well. I am looking forward to see how things progress from here. After the call I went to see all my friends from that side of town, catch up with them and chill.

By this time It had been almost a month of me running on the schedule I was and it only ramped up during the festival so the details of this week will be a bit scattered. I met lots of new people this time around and got a lot closer with a lot of people I met the last time. I also got to choose my shifts this time and I got all morning shifts so I was done by midday. I would still continue to lend a hand after my shifts anyway because it’s just fun to help out and it makes things easier for everyone. The food that was made this time was absolutely incredible! There was a stir fry that had ginger in it. It is one of the best stir fries I’ve ever had. I ate like 4 plates of it. There was this really delicious salad with a ginger dressing as well that I put back a lot of. They also made really good plantains one day. They were soft instead of crunchy and I ate an insane amount of them. I was given a heads up about how the digestive tract feels about eating a lot of plantains and then I found out for myself. I will say I do have an iron stomach so it wasn’t as intense as the heads up was. There was a few shifts I had where I was able to get some really good reading time in and it was really nice. My friend Ava had her dog Fisher there. He is literally the best dog I have ever seen in my entire life. I got to take him on a few walks and it was so nice. I would literally snag that dog if I knew she wouldn’t hunt me down. This time around I had to restrain myself on ordering the soft serve ice cream (I ate a crazy amount of it the last time) and the pizza since I was saving money for my journeys. I did really well with it. I still really want one of those garlic mushroom and tomato pizzas but it was a better decision to save money as best as I could. The shifts that I had the whole time were green team which is trash and recycling collection at 7am and then check in afterwards. I forgot what time it started tho. I didn’t do green team last time and it was honestly fun and easy. Sea Hunt drove the tractor with a trailer on the back of it and we would go around in a certain route to replace trash bags and collect the full aluminum can and plastic recycling containers and go dump it. We got fed 3 meals a day plus a middle of the night meal. Everything I had the whole time was so delicious and the breakfast was always on point. During one day at check in this guy came up to check in as a musician and he told me his name. When he said his last name I was like I have only heard that name once before. I asked him if he knew/was related to Doug Purington. He said yeah thats my uncle. I was so surprised I told him that he was one of my favorite teachers in high school. Never did I think something like that would happen. He is the mandolin player for Darby Wilcox and he was really good at it. That was also the 2nd time I’d ever seen Darby and the first time I’d seen her with the full band. Both times were absolutely incredible. The music was really good the whole time and my friends and I got some really good boogies in. They also had a bubble machine which was so much fun. There was a band that closed Thursday night called The Brothers Comatose and they were one of my favorite bands. The finisher for the entire event was good but I honestly would’ve preferred The Brothers Comatose to finish it out. Most nights I ended up wandering to Theme Park and most of the time the homies would join too. They almost always have people there playing bluegrass music and any one can join in. I heard some incredible music being played there. There is also always a fire going. I met lots of people out there. One night I met this lady and I think her name was Sarah and we sat and chatted for a while and then Christian one of the cooks joined us and we all sat there for a while chatting. It was really nice. We didn’t think the other Benji was going to make it either and then one night he showed up and it was incredible. Him, Ava and I went to go lay in the grass and look at the stars. It was really nice. There was also this other guy there named Ben and he was such a cool guy. Then at one point Ben, Benji and I were all in the same space. Something of that nature is unheard of. When two variations of Ben, Benji and/or Benjamin are in the same space anything can and will be done and it is a very empowering combination. When 3 are in the same space it is a monumental occurrence. Most nights I slept in my car and it was incredibly comfortable and I got some of the best sleep there. The Sunday after the festival was over we all gathered with blankets and pillows into the green room and watched Lord of The Rings. We all ended up falling asleep in there and throughout the night people woke up and moved on to their typical sleeping spaces however I just stayed there because it was nice and comfy. We had also went to the neighbors pool to swim and eat pizza one of the days after the festival. That was a lot of fun. The few days after that a friend and I slept in the nap shack. The nap shack is a small building with screened in openings so bugs don’t get in and a cute little porch. The porch had a couch and two chairs. I took a few naps on that couch and it was top tier. Especially when the sun was right there on it. Such a cozy spot. Inside the shack it had a bed a chair and a couch which were also really comfortable.

There was a really unfortunate thing that happened during the festival. My friend Calli’s laptop got smashed to pieces. At first it couldn’t be found. She told the people packing up the front check-in stuff to put her laptop in with the rest of the stuff. However one of the ladies told whoever was helping pack up to take it back out and leave it on the check in table. It wasn’t there the next morning. Hannah and Mack were riding around on the golf cart and just happened to see the screen part of it and they came around to the front gate where we were. They were really upset. That was a very important laptop. I have not heard anything about whether the stuff on the hard drive had been recovered or not. Later on I rode around with Calli to see if we could find more pieces. We found pretty much the rest of it. It was in many different pieces scattered around in this taped off area where cars don’t park and people don’t camp. It did have cars and tents around the area tho. We don’t know who did it and why.

During the festival Zig gave us some Tung Oil so I was finally able to treat my staff and make it weather resistant. We all ended up with staffs and were applying the Tung oil onto them for a few days. Hazel (Zigs dog) had to re warm up to me even tho the last time I was there I fed her and we became besties. Mo has this cute little moped that he rides around the grounds and the whole time I was like man I’d love to ride that thing. Well after the festival was over he walked up to me and said “So I heard this rumor that you want to ride the moped” and I was like oh yeah! Well he showed me the controls of it and he was like just bring it back to Mo Town whenever you are done. It was so fun to ride. I haven’t rode a motorized 2 wheeled vehicle since a year 1/2 ago and it was really nice to do so again. It rode really well and it had a cute horn on it. I stopped by this one campsite where a group of my friends were packing their things up to leave and chatted with them for a bit. There was a point where I had turned it off and was struggling to turn it back on and for a moment was like uh oh. Then I remembered that I needed to have the brake engaged to start it and then it started right up. Once I returned it Mo and I chatted for a bit and he showed me some more really cool features of the moped. On Sunday Stretch and I went around picking up all of the trash cans and recycling cans as well. Stretch would drive and I would hop off and toss them up there and when it was full we’d drop them off to get washed out and we would put the recycling containers where they normally go during the off season. They are made of cattle fencing so they don’t really need to be cleaned.

I stayed on the farm until I left for VA. I left on the 9th to Charlottesville because it was Aabhaasvara’s birthday on the 10th and I didn’t want to leave the morning of the 10th and show up late. Her and the others let me stay at their house for the night. I went to work for Jordan that morning staining a deck which was fun but it was also taking a while. I noticed more anxiety/fear/self judgement concerning working in that field. I was feeling very anxious and judgmental towards myself which turned into anger/aggravation with myself about not working fast enough and not finishing what I said I would be able to even tho it was taking more time than expected. I did my best to allow those feelings to be there and embrace them. After a while it started to subside and I also learned more about that momentum I have. I needed to leave around 2-3pm to pick up my car and leave around 4pm to get to Charlottesville at a decent time. He showed up around 2pm and I tensed up because I hadn’t made that much progress, however he was very nice about it which eased that tension a bit. As I continue to work in a construction environment and continue to embrace and process the fear momentums with that it gets easier and holds less ground. We finished up a section and then called it a day. He took me to where my car was so I could pick it up. The appointment was at 10 in the morning and we showed up at 3pm and they said they were finishing it up now. Jordan sat with me for a majority of the time until he had to leave but it was about an hour 1/2 when they finished. I didn’t get to the farm until around 4:30-5ish. It is really nice to have new brake pads and rotors on the car especially considering I was about to drive to the West Coast in about a week. I am already pretty behind schedule at this point. I needed to get things I left at the farm, I needed to reorganize my car, I needed to eat and say see ya later to the homies. When I got there Duck and Owen were chilling at the farm which was amazing because I had only seen Owen like once and I hadn’t seen Duck yet and it was really amazing to see them. Everyone else was there too and I am glad I got to see them one more time before I left. I ate some left overs of whatever I could find. It was the first time I ate that day and I was also ready to get on the road so I was just grabbing things, making coffee and eating enough to call it a meal. Calli helped me reorganize my car which I am incredibly grateful for because it is much better now than it was before. Everything is much more accessible and I have more space in there now as well so it doesn’t feel as cramped as it did. I don’t remember what time I ended up leaving but I was supposed to get to Charlottesville around 11pm and ended up getting there around 2am. The reason for that was I ran out of coffee and I started to get sleepy. I pulled off at a Walmart once and a gas station the other time to take naps so that I wouldn’t crash and so that I could make it there in one piece. When I got in I went straight to bed. They had saved me a plate of food but I don’t eat right before I go to bed and I ended up forgetting about it in general and never ate it.

The next morning I got up and did my practices. I had started to slack on my practices the last few days I was at the farm. When that started to happen I knew I needed to slow down and recenter myself. I had been on top of doing them the whole time I was in SC no matter the circumstances and that’s how I knew that it was time to dial it back. After I did my practices Anusha and Deepta had made an incredible birthday breakfast for Aabhaasvara. It was pancakes, fruit, tea, orange juice, vegetarian sausage and I think I am missing a few things. Devaaya and Sama were there too and it was really nice to see them again. After breakfast we all got into the car to go to this apple orchard that had pumpkins, apple cider donuts, hot apple cider and many other things. Aabhaasvara had to wear a blindfold on the way there so that she didn’t figure out where we were going. They told me that she had been wanting to get a pumpkin to carve but they had to convince her to wait because they had this planned. As we were pulling in they told her to take off the blind fold and when she saw the signs of the pumpkins and apples and all of that she became so excited and it was so fun to watch her reaction. We got parked and went in. It was on top of a mountain and on our right side you had a beautiful mountain range and on the left was fascinating flat lands. The views were incredible, It was beautiful and sunny and a very nice warmth. We went through this really cutesy store they had there first. We got some apple cider donuts which were alright. They were super sweet however if they were warm they would’ve been really good. After that we went and got some hot apple cider. We also saw that they were doing hayrides but at that time of day it was only for the kids on the field trips. It was a cheap hayride ticket too but by the time they would open up to the public we would be onto other things. The apple cider was really good and reminded me of my child hood. More specifically how every time during the season I would go to my Nana’s and she would always have some warmed up and she always had really fitting decorations and scents flowing through the house that really set the vibe for the season. After we got the cider we went to walk through the orchard. Anusha messed up her ankle and was in a boot so she didn’t walk all the way over there with us. It was a really nice and bolstering walk through the orchard. The three of us were chatting and catching up. It was really nice and very much needed. After we walked through the orchard we went over to where the pumpkins were to pick one out. They had lots of good pumpkins and some really big ones. The selection was great and the prices weren’t bad. At one point we had a little photoshoot with the pumpkins. It was really silly and fun. After we found the pumpkin we went to pay for it and leave. On the way out they have this little platform thing you can go up too and look at the views and hangout and we went up there and got our picture taken. It was really nice. I am very grateful to share these experiences with my sisters. We left and went on to the next stop. We went to this tea shop called Twisted Tea Branch in downtown Charlottesville. It was really cute in there and they had a really nice barefoot section. We sat over there after ordering. Anusha and I split a Pu-erh tea and Aabhaasvara and Deepta split a tea but I forgot which one. The ladies got some food and I wasn’t really that hungry so I didn’t order any food. Anusha and Deepta got salads and Aabhaasvara got a wrap and some lentils. I ended up snacking on Anushas salad and it was really delicious. We stayed there for a bit eating, drinking tea and chatting and it was so much fun. After we left there we went to go look at some shops in the town. There was one we stopped at that sold fudge and I knew as soon as I walked in there I would be buying some. I tried a few and ended up going with the dark chocolate one. It was so delicious. I kinda want another one right now. This reminded me of when my Dad used to bring my brother and I fresh fudge from Hershey Pennsylvania every time he would go. There was also this really cool antique shop that sold lots of old Chinese/Japanese things. It was a pretty big store. When I walked in there was a very large Buddha statue that immediately caught my eye. I worked my way to the back of the store. That’s where the more fascinating things were (at least to me). They had kimonos, lots of old furniture and really large statues. The furniture was really fascinating. You can see and feel the effort, intention and care that went into making those pieces. They were really well made and some had some very intricate designs on them. When I got around to that Buddha statue the energy radiating from it was very tangible. It had an aliveness to it that I have never felt from any object before. When we left from the town we went back to the house. Anusha and Deepta were going to start making Aabhaasvaras cake. Nishka was there too and it was really nice getting to see her as well. While they worked on the cake I took Aabhaasvara to get some shoes for the dinner tonight. Before we left I had pulled my visor down and something fell out of it. I think it was a chapstick. Then I caught a glimpse of something behind the flap of the mirror and I did a double take and was incredibly surprised. Under that flap was a $100 bill. I am still incredibly surprised and amazed by it. I knew exactly who it was and I am incredibly grateful for their kindness and their friendship. We went to target and it was loads of fun. I got to help her find the shoes she wanted and we got to have some great conversations and fill each other in on life since the last time we saw each other. When we were checking out I complemented the guys tattoo asked what it said and I also asked him old it was. He said he got it right after his 16th birthday and I was like how long ago was that. He said he had just turned 17 and I was dumbfounded to be honest. I thought he was at least 18 and maybe even closer to my age than that. After that we went back to the house for a bit before we left for the dinner. I left before everyone else to secure the reservation and I was also going to leave after the dinner to go to the Ashram because Saucha was hiring me the next day. We went to this place called Ten Sushi in downtown Charlottesville. It took me a second to find parking and when I did I wasn’t able to pay immediately because my phone doesn’t scan QR codes and I didn’t have wifi so that I could go to the website and pay. I was starting to stress slightly because I wanted to pay so I wouldn’t get towed and I also needed to get to the restaurant so that I could be there in time to secure the reservation. I decided that I would just go to the restaurant sit down for the reservation and use someones phone when they got there because I did the text the number thing and they sent me a link and so I sent that link to Deepta’s phone when she got there because she let me use her phone. The thing was being kind of difficult but it ended up working. When I got to the restaurant I walked up the stairs. As soon as I got up there I realized instantly I was not dressed for the occasion. I had on my brown overalls that has the tiny little mushrooms on them, I had my huge water bottle with all of the stickers on it, my staff and my nice brown toboggan. This place is fine dining, very dim lighting and everyone is dressed up all fancy. Sama had already gotten there and I went over to join him and caught up with him for a bit. Everyone else showed up and to start Sama order a pot of green tea for the table. He did end up having to leave because he had an acupuncture appointment he had forgotten about and felt it would be best not to miss it. The waiter was exceptional. He did very well at explaining everything, answering questions, being personable, and making sure we had everything we needed. Deepta and Nishka got the tiger roll, I think Anusha got the lobster thing, Aabhaasvara got the sea bass soup I think, Cesar got some sea urchin thing and I got a mushroom sushi roll. It was really good and the best vegetarian sushi I’ve ever had. Aabhaasvara got the side of sushi rice as well which was like marinated/fermented for 17 hours with 17 different ingredients. She let us try it and it was the best sushi rice I’ve ever had and ordered some myself. Since it was Aabhaasvara’s birthday they brought her the chocolate cake from the menu on the house. We all ate some of it as well and it was absolutely delicious. After that we all left and I headed for the Ashram. It was such an incredible day. I had so much fun getting to see and hangout with everyone and I am glad I got to be there for Aabhaasvara’s birthday.

I left Charlottesville around 8-9ish and got to the Ashram around 2-3am because I needed to stop a few times to power nap. I stayed in the extra bed in Cesars cottage but he had stayed in Charlottesville so it was just me. I got up around 6am and went to have breakfast. Then Saucha and I left to go to the job site. We set these main beams in for this house to have support for the floor and for the deck. I had never seen it before but these beams extended out for the deck that way there wasn’t any post on the underside of the deck going into the ground. Basically that went from the front side of the house all the out the back 8-10ft. I also helped pull some boards up so that some sort of material could be put under them and then put back on and also so we could put the beams in. We also had to knock out the wood that was a place holder for where the beams were going to be when they poured the concrete. I also got to meet Adam, Saucha’s business partner. He used to be a farmer so I got to talk with him about that and ask questions and get feedback. We got 3 out 4 of the beams in. We didn’t get around to the last one because the wood in one of the place holder spots for the last one wasn’t coming out so they were going to come back to that one. I also dug 2 holes for some footers. I did also notice that same fear momentum that has been arising in this kind of setting, however it wasn’t as strong and I was embracing it really well. I had made a sandwich for lunch that morning. It was mayo, mustard, red bell pepper, some lettuce, muenster and colby cheese. It had been sitting on the dash of Saucha’s truck so it was slightly melted by the time lunch came around and it was nice and warm and honestly one of the best sandwiches I’ve ever had. When we left for the day we stopped by the gas station on the way back to the Ashram. I don’t entirely remember what I did when we got back. When I did get back I saw Zavi and he was so excited to see me. I love that dog. We did have a group meeting that night and it was really nice. We all talked about our past week and we also talked about things to do around the Ashram for the following week. The next day I did some processing and just took a day to chill and do practices. Sunday I started pressure washing Saucha and Gudu’s camper. The first hour I was out there I barely made any progress because for some reason based on how it was made I thought there was only 2 settings of all the way open and all the way closed. I had it on all the way closed because it was actually getting the dirt off but it wasn’t covering much ground. When 9am rolled around Devaaya and Jacob walked by going up to the top of the hill to look for the break in the electrical line and let me know they were headed up. I went to join them after I talked with Gudu about the pressure washer deal and she said she would talk with Saucha about what to do. When I got up there they had already started digging. Devaaya had rented this device that sends pulses into the ground and tells you which direction the break in the line is. We continued to dig a big hole and were cautious going digging down. At one point Devaaya went to go grab something after explaining something and right before he left I went to dig out a spot and found the break in the line. He was really amazed that we found it. He wasn’t expecting us to find it but it was really amazing that we did find it. Finding that spot saved us tons of money and time. If it wasn’t found we would’ve had to dig up that entire trench and replace the whole line which would have been a lot of work. It was a really great time digging that out with Jacob and Devaaya. We talked about some great stuff and I hadn’t gotten to spend much time with them yet. Devaaya said he would treat us to ice cream that night. After that I went back to cleaning the camper. this time I was going to use soapy water, a brush and the power washer on the wide setting to rinse it off. However when I was switching the nozzle from small to wide I noticed that it opened up and still took up the dirt. When I realized that I realized I wasn’t using it the right way the first time. After that I was flying through the pressure washing because I was able to cover much more ground. It was really really satisfying doing that and watching all of that dirt come off. Devaaya popped up there and gave me a tip on going faster with it. During the pressure washing Ayana came by with her mom and was giving her a tour. It was really nice getting to meet her mom. She seemed like a sweet lady. We had pod at 3pm and I was attempting to finish pressure washing before then. I ended up finishing with 5 minutes to spare. All in all it took me about 2 hours (minus that hour where I wasn’t really doing much) to pressure wash the whole camper. After pod I went to clean up all of the stuff and put the things back that I had pulled out from under the camper. It was an electric pressure washer which I had never seen before but it worked very well, it was very mobile and stored very well. After pod I had some practices to do but I was hungry and we were also going to leave soon for ice cream. Thankfully Cesar was like I’ll make some stir fry. While he made the stir fry I went to do one of my practices and then when I got done I went to help clean up from the cooking. It was Devaaya, Jacob, Cesar and I going to get ice cream, which turned into a picnic because we also put the stir fry into containers and brought it with us. We went to the A&A (local gas station) down the road and then went to the elementary school across from it. They had some tables under an awning that we went to sit at. It was a very pleasant picnic. We talked about a lot of great stuff and enjoyed each other’s presence. The food and ice cream were also really good. I ate the ice cream first. I am incredibly grateful to have gotten to spend that time with my brothers. Monday I helped with a few things. Jacob and I changed out the poop buckets under the composting toilets (I actually don’t think this was monday). I am pretty sure this was the day where I woke up with a headache. I went to go do my practices in the woods and after I finished some of them I was like I need to go lay down. I laid down from about 11 to 5ish. I wasn’t really sleeping until about 4 when I actually fell asleep for about an hour. It didn’t help much and then I attempted the ice pack route which also didn’t help much. There is also a big change that occurred while I was there. I had been pondering about this for a while and then I talked with Devaaya about it who was able to explain certain aspects of this topic to me. I also later talked with Jnanda about it. Since I have decided to become a farmer part of that is also animal care and part of that is killing and processing the animals. It is a task that someone in a community must do and I want to do it so that I know it is being done the most humane way and using every part of the animal. I also know that anyone doing it with me will be trained well in how to do it so that if I am not there I know that it will be done the right way. With that I was like it would be pretty silly to be vegetarian while also processing animals. Therefore I am no longer vegetarian. I had been thinking that as a farmer it is my duty to provide for the community I am in, in that way and I was thinking about how it can be done considering the spiritual side of things. Devaaya was able to answer those questions I had and at the end he said that this is also something you must come to terms with within yourself. That night I meditated on it. I put everything on the table and asked myself if this is something I can do. I decided that it is something I can and must do to fulfill my duty and to provide for others. It also helps that I grew up in a hunting family and I already have a foot in the door with this sort of stuff. Given that with all of the other things I am putting forth effort to learn, learning how to care for the animals in the best way, how to properly and in the best way possible slaughter animals and how to process them in a way where every part of the animal is used is also at the forefront of what I am putting forth effort to learn. I also met Devan finally. I had seen him in pod and heard lots about him. He got back the night before I left and we sat in the kitchen for a while chatting and getting to know each other. He is a really cool guy. It was a great time to recharge and start to get back on top of things, slow down and recenter myself. It was really nice getting to see and catch up with everyone as well.

I was going to leave from VA on Wednesday however I had to go back to SC (which I really didn’t want to) to vote early because if I didn’t do it then then I wasn’t going to vote. This is another thing I had been putting thought into. I used to be on the whole screw the government and the system I’m not voting blah blah blah. Then I started to think that I am here at this point in human history, in this country, born at this time with the opportunities I have and part of having this human experience is voting. I have grown into the mindset of I am here at this time as a human so I must examine my situation and who I am and what that means in this society and I must act and contribute accordingly. With that I left Tuesday morning at 6am. I went straight to the voting office. When I got there they told me that early voting doesn’t start until Monday and I was not going to still be there by then. I opted for the mail in ballot which I didn’t really want to do but it is better than nothing. I did leave tho because I was getting it mailed to where I am going in OR and I didn’t know the address so while I waited for Jesse to respond I went to the Cottonwood to do my practices. After I did my practices I went back and filled out what I needed to fill out to get a mail in ballot. On the way out to my car I ran into my aunt and uncle which was a wild experience. They parked one car over from me, they were in Spartanburg which I don’t think they come to often, I was also just in town to do one thing and pass through and I also never go to the county building. It was a very nice surprise. While I was in Spartanburg I was like “if you see me no you didn’t”. I really wanted to fly under the radar and just dip in and dip out. I met Calli at the Little River roastery for some coffee and to hangout for a bit until I had my Jnanda call. We also ended up getting some food from Tropical grill. Also when I got into town I went to the Fresh Market and got some sushi. It was really good. Around 3 we went on about our days because I had a Jnanda call and my grand father let me use his house. I did park down at his shop so that my car was kinda hidden. I saw my cousin which was really nice as well. The call went great. After that I left to go to the Skunk Farm because I was staying there for the night. It was just Hannah there but then she left to go to a dog sitting gig. Calli came by and we watched Pirates of the Caribbean. It was lots of fun. I hadn’t seen that movie all the way through in a while and I forgot how good it was. I left the next morning at 6am.

I stopped back at the Ashram because it’s a 4 hour drive from where I was, I left my staff there and leaving from there would take my the northern route and I wouldn’t pass through all of the road closures in E Tennessee and W North Carolina. It would also be a nice place to break, rest, do some practices and eat. When I got there I went straight to the kitchen because I wanted to eat first. Devan and Cesar were already in there actively finishing up lunch. They asked me what I was doing back and I told them and then they offered me some lunch. I forgot what it was but it was really delicious. Afterwards I took a hammock nap and then went to do my practices. It was a really nice nap and my practices were very refreshing. After that I gathered my things, made a cup of coffee and skidaddled.

Once I left I got on the road headed to OR. First stop along the way was Bozeman Montana. I originally was going to drive only 6 hours a day except for Day 1 of driving. I was going to go for 10 hours so that I would be on track with my time frame. I went through Kentucky, Indiana, Illinois, Iowa, South Dakota, dipped into Wyoming and into Montana. I left on the 16th and arrived on the 19th. I had realized after day 1 of driving that the driving wasn’t bad and it was actually really nice so I just drove and drove until bed time. I would take a 3 hour break around midday and occasional breaks as needed during the rest of the day. I was also really excited to see my friends. During my travels I would do my practices in my car in parking lots and rest stops. Each day I was up and on the road by 5-6am and on the last stretch I woke up really early and was on the road by 4am. I had ended up stopping at a rest stop to do my practices, chill out and let the sunrise so that I could enter into and drive through Montana in the daylight. I don’t remember what state I was in when the time changed but I had picked up my phone to check the time and my phone told me that it noticed a change in time zones and adjusted my clocks and alarms. For a moment there my reference of time was completely shot. I didn’t know how much the time had changed if I had thought about it tho it wouldn’t be that hard to figure out. I had no idea what the actual time was if that makes sense. In that moment I truly realized what is meant by time is just a construct we use for planning and things of that nature. It wasn’t until I glanced at my computer and saw that it had’t updated to the new time zone and so I was like okay I know what time I am in.

Driving through Kentucky was really nice. Eastern Kentucky is quite mountainous. There were many parts of the road one in particular (driving through this part during the day would’ve been amazing) that were incredible. This one I am talking about was huge walls of rock on either side of me reaching quite high into the sky. It was incredibly fascinating. I was beginning to come out of the really mountainous part when I found a 24 hour gas station to fill up at and sleep. I slept really well and wasn’t disturbed. The Western half of Kentucky was starting to turn into rolling hills and flatten out. Indiana is where the farmland started and progressively turned into nothing but farm land as far as the eye could see in all directions in South Dakota. Indiana was really nice. Before I crossed into Indiana I went through Louisville which was a really fascinating city that had a size-able river flowing next to it. I got to cross a really cool bridge. Just a few minutes after crossing into Indiana I stopped in Jeffersonville for some coffee. I got a really delicious dark roast. From there I went up towards Indianapolis. When I was just a few miles from Indianapolis I stopped at this place that had lots of food options and a gas station. I saw this Mongolian stir fry place that I thought was interesting. There was an Indian restaurant next door, a pizza place a little bit down and a pancake and coffee house a little bit further down. I got a chicken stir fry with the sweet thai chili sauce. It was really delicious. However it ran right through me. I almost didn’t make it to the bathroom. I got back on the road and went through Illinois all the way to Western Iowa. It was incredibly fascinating to watch the landscape slowly fade into the next. Over the drive things started to flatten out and shift into farm land and pasture. Kentucky was mostly horses, and after that was mostly cows. The further west I went the bigger the cows and all the other animals got. By the time I got into South Dakota it was 97% farmland and the rest was cows and living spaces. I also saw windmill farms for the first time and they are incredible. They are so massive too. Pictures do not do them justice. I also saw them at night and at first I was like what is that. They have the red flashing lights on them and it was just a collection of close to if not more than 100 red lights flashing, some in sync others not. It was a wild sight to see. On the 2nd to last day of driving I went from Western Iowa to Western South Dakota right where MT, WY and SD border each other. When I got up on the last day I went straight into Montana where I stopped to chill, do some practices and wait for the sun to rise. I forgot what day it was but I pulled over at one point to take pictures of the sunrise because it was so beautiful. My first sunset in the midwest was also incredibly magickal. It is by far one of the prettiest sunsets I have ever seen. I was also surprised to see that driving through somewhere where the only lights as far as you could see were my own headlights and the ones of others on the road that I couldn’t really see the stars that well. Once the sun was rising I got back on the road. Driving through Montana is incredible. It is the most beautiful state I have ever been to. It is very mountainous. It also has a lot of what could be called rolling hills but they aren’t like any I have seen. They are more like the start of mountains. The scenery is unlike any I have seen before and it is magnificent. The actual mountains themselves are larger than any I have seen as well. They have so much variation and definition. I also saw snow capped mountains for the first time. I also saw magpies for the first time and they are really cute. I saw a badger as well but it was dead on the road. The deer here are huge. Driving into downtown Bozeman is nice. It’s a cute little place surrounded by so the most beautiful mountain ranges I have ever seen. It’s got the city feel without being over bearing.

I finally pulled into my friend’s house around 2-3pm Saturday afternoon. Lydia was walking Bonzo and met me at the driveway. I finally got to meet the legendary Bonzo. Kate also walked up as I was getting my stuff out of my car and it was so great to see both of them again. We went down to the house and I set my stuff down. Claire was there. I forgot when Lexi and Libby came around. That was my first time meeting Lexi and it was good to see Libby and Claire again as well. They gave me a little house tour. It’s a really nice and old house. It’s one of the more beautiful houses I’ve seen. We also went to go see the goats and sheep. They were so cute and silly. There are baby goats as well. We went over to the river as well. The land is really beautiful. We walked over to the river. There are a few little streams in the little pasture area that flow into the river. There is also a nice cob house back there and a sauna. The river is really beautiful and cold. The rocks there are also really cool and there are a lot of great rocks for skipping. However you have to walk up stream a bit to a spot where the water is more suitable for skipping. We also went to a halloween party in the woods the first night I was there. We all dressed up as clowns and put on some clown makeup. I used it to color my beard and mustache too. It wasn’t anything crazy. It was just a handful of people hanging out around a fire, there was some people fire spinning. There was snow on the ground so it was a safe space to do it. I met another Ben while I was there. Not everyone was dressed up. Well before we left tho my friends did give me a heads up about someone having recently been murdered in the woods in the area. They said we could do something else if I didn’t feel comfortable going out into the woods given the recent events. I wasn’t too bothered by it especially considering we would be in a group setting. When we got there there was a really cute dog but she was a barker. Once she got a chance to sniff us she quit barking. More people also probably would’ve been there if it wasn’t for the recent event. We didn’t stay too long tho. It was a chill time but it didn’t feel all inclusive. On our way out this guy showed up as we were leaving. He had on a military style get up. I noticed in his breastplate area there was a loaded magazine in it. He was a very up beat guy. I accidentally shined my headlamp in his eyes and he said something along the lines of, “I appreciate the light in the eyes” and then he gave me a hug and as he walked past me I turned around to see if our other friends were coming with us and I saw an AR slung across his back. After seeing that I walked over to my friends and was like it’s time to go and we all got out of there fairly quick. Some of them didn’t notice the gun. He didn’t seem like the kind of guy to use it but you never know especially considering the circumstances. When we got back to the house we ate some food and played some card games until people started to tire out. It was a really interesting and fun first night in Bozeman.

I am struggling to remember the events of the week more than I thought I would. I don’t entirely remember what happened on sunday. I do know that I went into downtown Bozeman to the public library to join Pod. Before I went to the library I went by this coffee shop called Wild Joe’s and got a mocha. It was a really good one too. I got to the library and went in and got a private room. Once I was in there I had some time to work on this blog post before I joined pod. When 2:55pm rolled around I went to join the class. Around 3:05pm I began to wonder why I wasn’t being let in. I texted Aabhaasvara to see if we had pod or not and as soon as I sent the message I realized what was going on. To my brain I was joining at the normal time to join but based on location it was not the normal time. I forgot about being 2 hours behind what once was “normal” time to me and completely missed pod. I couldn’t help but chuckle about it. Later that night someone built a little fire outside and we all sat out there and chatted. Lydia had a roasted banana on a stick and I was curious to see how it would taste and so I tried it. It wasn’t that bad, probably would eat again and since it was cooked the peel didn’t taste bad either. It was slightly slimy though.

Monday (I think) is when Claire, Lydia and I went to go tour houses for some of our other friends that are moving out there for the season. We toured 3 houses. Before we left tho we went to this coffee shop up the road called The Coffee Pot. It is a really cute coffee shop with good coffee and they are also connected to a pottery place where they sell the pottery in the coffee shop. I think it is family owned and operated. The coffee and potter go hand in hand. The pottery was incredible but so expensive. I think before this as well I accidentally broke my classic Vitruvian Man mug. I dropped it. It was a clean break. Lexi bought me some food and drink safe glue to fix it. I did fix it however after it was fixed I was drinking some coffee out of it and I was thinking “What is being leeched into my coffee right now?” It icked me out thinking about it so I am going to go thrift a new mug. Anyway back to the houses. The first house we went to was horrible. It was all white, a downstairs unit, small rooms, low lit. The windows were slightly underground so they had metal cages around them so no one would fall in the hole on the outside so the views out the window were not good. It felt very much like an asylum in there. For a second I forgot everything about one of the houses. The second house was better than the first one (anything is better than that one). One of the downstairs neighbors and his friend were outside eating some ice cream when we showed up and we chatted with them for a bit while we waited on the lady to show up and open up the house. It was nicer, the rooms were bigger, the neighbors were cool, it didn’t seem like it would drive you crazy either and it was in a nice neighborhood. The last one we went to was also really nice. It had the most color out of all of the houses but it had some really small rooms. It was also in a nice neighborhood. Between viewing one of the houses we went to this cute little park/trail in between a neighborhood and laid on a blanket in the grass for like 30 minutes. It was really nice and relaxing. The sun was shining on us so it was nice and warm and comfy.

Remembering what happened on what day isn’t working too well so now I am just going to talk about it as I remember it. One of the days I basically rested all day because I wasn’t feeling the best. I feel it was a combination of not staying hydrated and the change in altitude. Bozeman is a little over 5,000ft in elevation and I have never been (planes don’t count) at that elevation before, especially for a few days. Kate, Lydia, Bonzo and I went on a hike to this river one day. It was a very beautiful hike. I ended up taking my shoes off during it because my feet were not happy being in the boots. We got to this part in the hike where we crossed a really cool bridge and then a bit further up found a spot to stop and hangout by the river. We wanted to cold plunge in the water. Kate didn’t tho because it was so cold.

I had already hopped in to test the water because I had my swimsuit with me. However Lydia didn’t have hers with her and she didn’t want to walk back with wet clothes on so she decided to skinny dip. I decided to join her so she wasn’t the only one. The first time I went in the water was so cold it hurt a little. The second time I went in it wasn’t that bad on the lower half. Lydia and I waded out to a good spot, then counted down from 3 and dunked under at the same time. As soon as I went under I was like oh man I need to get out of the water. I was already headed for the land when I came up out of the water. That 2nd time got me, however it was so refreshing and energizing. It was about a 20-30 minute hike back to the car and my feet didn’t start returning to normal until I got back there. That was the coldest water I had ever been in. It was my first time skinny dipping and it was a lot of fun. I am glad I got to do it with some great friends in the mountains.

One day Lydia, Claire and I went to this reservoir for a little bit. It was really beautiful and I got a really good rock skip in. We didn’t stay too long there. While staying with them we also watched the Harry Potter movies 3-7. That was great because I haven’t seen them in so long. Their landlord’s son Adam had 2 dogs named Pookie and Tux. Pookie had just recently had puppies and they opened their eyes while I was there. They are so cute. Pookie is also the sweetest dog ever and only wants belly rubs. I also don’t remember what day this was but there was this really cute black goat that had no ears or horns attempting to cross this board across one of the streams in their backyard. It was so nervous to do so and we all hyped it up and gave it words of encouragement and the goat managed to cross and it was so cute and and exciting to watch the goat overcome it’s fear and cross the board.

Adam was moving his herd of goats and sheep down to N. California for the winter but the herd was too big so he had to downsize it and push back his departure date. I was going to learn his method of process the animal since as a farmer that is one essential part of being a farmer especially in a sustainable community. However I never did because that day I wasn’t feeling good and then also prioritizing other things. One day tho we were in the house and we saw him getting ready to kill one of the sheep. Some things he did that I feel aren’t best to do is, 1. Doing it in front of the rest of the herd 2. The bleed out method (which I will get into in a bit) 3. Turn his back on the sheep and talk to someone while it was transitioning. Firstly we were about 100-300ft from where he was doing it and the fear and suffering of that sheep was so thick and heavy in the air. We saw for ourselves why the bleed out method is not the best method so we then started looking up better ways to kill the animals. This is a topic I will do further research on and get proper training in. As well as processing the animal so that every part is being used in some way, shape or form. Doing it next to the herd is not a good thing to do I feel. Again something else I will be doing more research on but I feel that doing it away from the herd in a space where they can’t see what is going on is best. Being there with the animal during their transition and radiating Love and Gratitude for the life they lived and for the things they are providing for everyone is a much better way of doing that. Nothing wants to be left alone as it’s dying.

One night Kate, Lexi and I went to the sauna on the property. It was really nice. It is kind of small. It has a wood stove in there and a bucket to fill up with water and set on top of the stove. We sat in there for a while. We didn’t actually get the heat cranking but we did get deep into the conversation which was great. We talked about some really good stuff. I don’t remember too many meals we had but I do know that they were great and really delicious. They also had gotten some fire wood dropped off there and we were going to move and stack it while I was there but we ended up not getting around to it.

My next to last day there (I think) Claire, Lydia, Kate and I went on a hike to Lava Lake. This is the best hike I’ve ever been on. It was 2 miles and some change up to the lake and then the same back out. About a mile in I took my boots off because once again my feet were itching to be out. We hit snow a bit from the top which was really great. I love snow so much and I am excited to see what kind of snow this place in OR gets. There was a river beside us along the whole way and the forest is incredibly beautiful. It was very rocky terrain as well but still easy to maneuver. We passed a handful of people on the way up. I was getting lots of great pictures as well. We stopped a few times and one time was a little snack break. Claire offered some of her peanut butter stuffed pretzels and they were really good. She also gave us a fun little ecology lesson on the way up. When we got to the top it was bathroom break time. The lake was incredible. Situated nicely in the valley of surrounding mountains, some covered with snow. There were huge boulders ever where. It is an incredible spot and the prettiest spot I have ever been to. The water was cold but it felt great. I didn’t have my swimming trunks but would’ve stripped down and hopped in if it weren’t for the fact that a father and his son were fishing on the other side and also that random people could show up at any time. Lydia hoped in the water tho because she had her swim suit. I really wanted to get in and Claire suggested I hop in with my underwear on but I didn’t want to go commando back down. It was a bit warmer here because the sky was open and the sun was shining on us. I skipped some rocks and found a very good rock to chill on for a bit. We all sat there for a bit enjoying everything and then we got up to leave after a bit so that we could make it back before the sun went behind the ridge. We were moving it on the way back down. We stopped a few times. Mainly because Bonzo would look back and see Lydia way in the back and he would wait for her to catch up before continuing on. It was a 10/10 hike. That was also the longest stretch and most intense terrain I have ever been on barefoot. I also was able to walk across the cold ground, snow and icy puddles and be fine. Before we started the hike there was a guy kayaking down the river using his hands to steer which was really cool and bold because that water is definitely very cold. He also had on a lot of gear to aid with that however his face wasn’t covered but I am sure that any water splashing on it was refreshing. It might’ve been this night but the last night I was there we watched “Over the Garden Wall”. It was so silly and fun and I am glad we watched that.

One day while we were there before we toured one house (not the day of the 3 we toured) we went to hangout with 2 of Claire’s friends because it was one of theirs birthday. I think her name was Lauren but I am not sure and I forgot the other ladies name. We went to this place called Second Wind first which is an outdoor gear thrift store. I found this really awesome hat and some good winter gloves that I can work in. They also had a $1 mystery box. We had found a $1 on the ground and one of the ladies went to grab it and bought the mystery box for Lauren (I’m rolling with the Lauren and hoping it’s right). It was one of those Owala water bottles that someone left there. It still had water in it which was funny. It was a nice water bottle tho. After that we went to this CO-OP grocery store thing that I have never seen before. They had a lot of good stuff there and a quinoa chicken soup from the hot bar that was really great. I also finally found and got one of the giant dark chocolate Hail Mary tarts (https://hailmerry.com/products/dark-chocolate-tart) - for reference. We also stopped by this really nice crystal, song bowl, jewelry, meditation rooms, tarot reading store place and it was the nicest one I’ve ever been too. After that on the way to drop Lauren and the other lady off Lauren offered us a cupcake because she had a ton of them and there were some she didn’t want. I was the only one that wanted one and I got a red velvet. It was really good. They were also really fun people and it was nice to meet both of them. After that Claire, Lydia and I went to go tour this house. It was the nicest of them all appearance wise. However since it was so old the guy had to let us know that there is lead in the paint, small amounts of asbestos in the popcorn ceiling and I think something else but maybe not. Really cool guy tho.

I think thats all from Montana.

I left Bozeman on Saturday and arrived in Spokane that afternoon. I went through Butte and what Claire said about it looks like they peeled the skin off of the Earth is so true and gross. I also went through Missoula and Northern Idaho which was really beautiful. I passed by the Couer d’Alene lake at sunset which was absolutely incredible. It is a huge lake. The physical body I have was worn out when I made it to Spokane tho. Bozeman sits at a little over 5,000ft, Spokane is at a little over 2,000ft and I passed through the Continental Divide which is about 7,000ft in elevation. Bouncing between 2,000ft - 7,000ft for 6 hours did a number of my physical body. I was feeling some weird pressures from all of the altitude shifts in my head and overall my body felt very exhausted. I slept so good that night. I stayed with 2 of Jnanda students that I have met through Pod, Satya and Max. The night I got there we had pizza, Max’s brother (I think based off context clues) Sam came by as well. I got to meet Max’s kids too. We had a great night finally getting to meet in person and catch up and all that. The next day Max took his son out for his birthday so I only saw him in the morning. Satya cooked us breakfast tacos and made some coffee. It was really delicious. After that his son came by and we went to this trail in the area next to a river to hangout there for a bit and so that I could see a little bit of the area. I talked with his son a lot about video games because I noticed he is really into them and I used to play a lot so I figured it would be a good way for us connect. Kid really knows his stuff and is actually really intelligent when it comes to the games, consoles and how to operate and fix them. I was really impressed. After we left the trail we went by Dutch Bros which is a coffee chain out here that Lexi told me to try because it was really good. I got the classic mocha and it was really delicious. However I am noticing with buying coffee and it not being in a mug but in the cups they give you that towards the bottom, especially if it’s been sitting for a while that I can taste all the things leeching into the drink from the film layer they put on the inside of the cups. It has a weird sensation in the back of my throat that makes me feel like I am ingesting chemicals. I left Spokane around mid day Sunday. It was great finally meeting them in person and getting to spend some time with them.

On the way to Bellingham I crossed the Columbia River Gorger at the town of Vantage. They had a scenic pull off that I had to stop at. It had a sign that said “Beware of Rattlesnakes”. This is the biggest river I have ever seen in my entire life. It was truly a magnificent sight. Pictures of it are in the Miscellaneous folder. After that I went through this mountain pass that I forgot the name of. It was raining tho and there were a view parts where standing water pulled my car to the side slightly so I was driving very slow, alert and cautious. Some people were flying down the road and I was sitting there like how are you doing that my guy. I was on edge during that stretch of road. I finally made it out of there and I drove past downtown Seattle. The roads there were ridiculous and the engineering of them was done in a crazy way. It was so hectic. They also have this thing that I have never seen before where at the on ramp of many entrances to the highway it is “Metered”. What that means is that they have these red lights at the bottom of the entrance ramp and it turns green for 1 car at a time. I really don’t know what the point of it is but it’s there. WA also has this thing where they really don’t want you driving tired and they have a lot of rest areas with free coffee ran through a volunteer program. Pretty cool stuff. Anyway I made it to Ben’s house around 8pm. They had just finished making dinner when I arrived. It was some fish that the other Ben (I think) had caught, potatoes, bread, fresh homemade pesto and salad. The other Ben’s full name is also Benjamin Johnson. Crazy stuff right. First 3 variations of Ben in the same space on the East Coast and now it has happened on the West Coast. After dinner Ben and I (not the other Johnson) went on a walk around the neighborhood and got caught up on each others life from the past few months which was nice. When we got back to the house every one was watching Star Wars. We sat and joined them and then once the movie was over everyone went to bed. Monday Ben and I did our practices together in the morning, had tea and breakfast and then we went out to this local coffee shop that he really likes. It’s called Cafe Blue. It was really cute and it had really good coffee. I saw they had a 27oz french press on the menu which I have never seen at any coffee shop I have ever been too. I bet it was really good tho. Next time I am there I am definitely getting that. While there I worked on this post a bit and he painted a Gnome with water colors. It came out really well too. On the way there Ben took us the scenic route to show me some of the area. After the coffee shop we stopped by this local pottery shop. Everything was so expensive but really amazing. Some pieces were unlike anything I have seen. After that we went to this book store because Ben was looking for a book. While I was there I bought my own copy of Dune for $12. I had started it at the Ashram and I have been thinking about expanding the genre of books that I read to mix it up and so that was a perfect one to buy especially because it was a lot cheaper than books usually are. After that we went by this coffee place called the Woods because I wanted another cup of coffee and it was right on this walking trail next to one of the bay’s. We walked up it one way for a bit chatting and on the way back we saw this seagull munching on a dead seal. It was very fascinating. I have never seen a seal before or anything bigger than a jellyfish or crab washed up on the shore and then the seagull was just there doing its thing. We walked down to that section and a little further up because Ben saw a crab down there he wanted to check out. I also found these 2 beautiful purple seashells. Now on my dashboard I have a seashell from the Outer banks and 2 from the Seattle coast. After we left there we went back to his house to chillax for a bit. I read a little bit and also his partner came by. I remember her name, however I am not sure how to spell it. I think it is Laurnel. It was nice meeting her. She was fun and goofy. Ben attempted to read his book and he also wrote a formal letter of resignation for his job and Laurnel was making a handmade cribbage board for her friend for her birthday. I started looking at silly memes for a bit there. After a while we left to go meet Namita for dinner. I might’ve mentioned him before. Namita knows a lot about many things under the farming/land stewardship umbrella and I called and talked with him about it all one day while I was still at the Ashram. He sent me over a document of a lot of resources to check out for those things. We went to this taco truck. I got a burrito because I like those better. It was also my first taco truck because I didn’t really know any taco trucks before I went vegetarian. The burrito was huge and incredibly delicious. It took me a good while to eat it. It was also really nice to finally meet Namita in the physical. We talked about a lot of great stuff and got to talk a lot about the farming umbrella. I am very excited for our relationship to grow and for us to partner on things in the times to come. We sat outside at these picnic tables. We were there for a bit and then we left and we dropped Namita back off on the way to Ben’s house. When we got back to the house they were watching the next Star Wars and same thing as the previous night every one went to bed after the movie was over kind of. Olivia fixed the leak in her bike tire which I had never seen done before so that was fun to watch. I read a bit more of Dune before I went to bed as well. When we got back Ben helped me book a reserve a spot on the ferry for the next day.

I left around 5:40ish the next morning. The ferry didn’t leave until 8:45am, I needed to be there around 30-45 minutes beforehand and it took 1h 20ish to get there and I stopped for coffee along the way. Ben also gifted me a really nice mug I think he made. It’s great, fits in the cup holder of my car and has really nice color to it. I arrived very early to the ferry station. I was the first one there. I sat there for a bit and chilled. While I was sitting there a semi pulled up and I thought no way a semi can fit on this thing. The closer it got to time the more the area filled up. The ferry finally arrived and it was huge and it did have semi’s on it. I think 3-4 came off of that one. It was wild. Once the ferry had unloaded they loaded all of us up in a specific way. Once we were all loaded up we set off. The person driving the boat was great. I wasn’t able to tell we had started to move until i was looking at the scenery. I took lots of pictures and spent the whole ferry ride out of the deck taking pictures and taking in the views and the amazing weather. It was about a 30 minute ferry ride I think. I am not sure what the temperature was. With wind chill my guess would be between 30-40 degrees. It was such a fun experience. Once we docked they unloaded us. They are very timely and efficient with the whole process. From there I went to a coffee shop up the road for more coffee and a bathroom. Then I went on my way. I drove all the way till I passed Portland OR. I thought about taking a longer more scenic route around Olympic National Forest however that would’ve added 4-5 more hours to the drive which I wasn’t really feeling. I stopped in Tacoma WA for my Jnanda call and coffee. It was an interesting city. It also has this thing called a Tacoma Dome which I am not entirely sure what its purpose serves. The call went great and he helped me with some things. When I went to get coffee I had to park in this really tight parking spot. I had to get out on the passenger side and when I came back out I had to shimmy to the door to unlock it, shimmy out and then climb in through the passenger side. From Tacoma I went through Vancouver, Portland and called it a night at 6pm at this really nice rest area. It said “Parking longer than 12 hours prohibited”. That was perfect because I was going to be gone before I reached that time limit.

The next day I drove the last stretch to the Homestead in Vida. I left with enough time to find a coffee shop to hangout at and do some computer stuff before I had to be here at 10am however maneuvering Eugene OR was not fun. The roads there are crazy. I almost turned the wrong way down a one way but to be fair I wasn’t entirely paying attention. None of the sit down coffee shops (that I could find) were open yet and I also didn’t want to pay to park anywhere. I decided to go to one of the many drive through coffee shacks (I went to a Dutch Bros) and go to a public library and use their wifi from the parking lot. Well their public library didn’t have a close parking lot that was open and then there was some parking in the alley beside it. I parked there for a bit and the wifi wasn’t really working so I worked on some pictures I took in WA. Then I saw the most vibrant and beautiful sunrise I have ever seen. A bit later I heard a guy yelling occasionally. They got closer and I decided I wasn’t sticking around so I left that area and went closer to where the homestead is located. I still couldn’t find a sit down coffee shop or a library so I went to a random parking lot and did some practices. Around 9:20am I left and headed out here. I arrived at 10am.

I met Jesse and he showed me where I’d be staying and gave me some general information. We went into the farm house and chatted for a bit and then I met his partner Ally. After a bit I went to the camper I am staying in to get settled in. It is a really nice camper from the 60s. It has power and a heater which is great. It is really cute and cozy in here. It is under a shed as well that I am able to park my car under. I called and chatted with Hannah for a bit while I was getting my stuff in here which was nice. Once I got everything in I went to shower. After I showered I met more of the people that live here. Jasmine and her baby and 2 other people that I forgot their names. They had homemade sourdough and gave me some. It was really delicious. They were also in the process of making hot sauce with peppers they grew on the property. I also met BB and Brixton 2 of the dogs on the property and a cat that I forgot the name of. I haven’t explored yet because it has been raining and I wanted to cozy up for a bit and also work on this, however my computer is on 3% and it is suppose to rain for the next few days so I am going to go explore any way.

I went exploring. The property is really nice. They have a lot of garden space, fruit and nut trees as well with lots of variety. There are 2 cows 5 sheep (1 ram with really big and cool horns), some goats and a lot of chickens. There are also a ton of bee hives here. There are multiple buildings on property and about 12+ people living here, 2 kids and one baby. I walked by the river which is really large. There is a basketball goal here too. I walked towards the west side of the property and found some trails and so I walked those for a bit and ended up taking one that brought me back towards where everything is. It is also still raining however it should stop on Tuesday. I was walking by the Great Hall (The OX) and Zach and Damien were out side and we chatted for a bit. They had asked if I had seen the inside of the Great Hall yet and I said no. They showed me the inside. There is a wood stove to heat the place, projector, music stuff, 2 pool tables and I think they also have bedrooms in there. This place is a generational farm and so it isn’t off the grid however they are putting forth effort to make that happen. I talked with the guy here that was specifically working on that and he was telling me about it. There is one building on property that is already off grid and kind of like a little tester for it. He said he could show me some things about that sort of stuff while I am here which I will definitely take him up on that offer. That night they had their monthly community meeting where everyone that lives here gets together to go over and talk about things. They introduced me there and we all went around and said our names and what we are looking forward to the most. After that I went off to the camper to watch the pod recording and go to bed.

Things I did for the first time on the way out here:

Traveled across the country by myself. Went through 4 states in 1 day. Saw windmills/windmill farms. Was completely surrounded by farmland with nothing else in sight. Saw a badger and a magpie. Saw evidence of wildfires. Went skinny dipping. Watched Over the Garden Wall. Road a ferry. Saw snow capped mountains. Saw metered highway ramp entrances. Saw signs telling you to watch out for poisonous snakes. Met another Benjamin Johnson. Ate at a taco truck. Saw a seal. Saw an 80mph speed limit sign. Drove 300+ miles without stopping. Got on one stretch of highway that said stay straight for 375 miles. Toured houses. Went to a CO-OP and a thrift store for hiking gear. Experienced higher elevations. Ate at a taco truck. See a bike tire leak fixed. See a french press on a coffee shop menu. Ate at a truly fine dining restaurant. Slept at gas stations and rest stops. Tried Mongolian food. Went clowning in the woods. Went on a 5 mile hike (that I know of). Played a new card game. Ate a fire roasted banana. Saunaed in the woods. Cold plunged in a river. Saw a badger, seal and magpie. Entered 3 different time zones. I feel I could be missing a few things but that is all that I can remember for now.

Things I have learned and noticed:

I learned how to tell the difference between spruce, fir and pine trees. I have learned about many fear momentums that I have. I have learned a lot of what not to do and how not to be. I have also learned of many old habits, patterns, egoic momentums that I do not and will not go back to again. I learned about places that are good to stay at when traveling. I gained an even deeper understanding of growth is a choice. I know the things I must do, things I need to learn and I know that it is a matter of choice if I make it happen or not. I have learned how to book a ferry. The thing I would say I have learned the most about is myself. I am sure there are many other things I have learned as well but that is all that I can remember right now.

With all of that being said I know this one was super long but there was a lot of ground to cover and I hope you all enjoy the update. I love you all very much and I will be writing again soon!

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